You may have a bunch of hallway buddies, Facebook contacts, and social relations, but would you truly feel really linked to those”buddies”? How do you know for certain? If you wish to understand how to put your friendships to the evaluation and make better friends, keep reading these methods (more in a friendship essay).
Ask a friend for help.
If you need assistance, is your friend there for you? Or, how does your friend make excuses, evaporating as it becomes convenient? Real friends will appear if you need a helping hand and will appear to celebrate together with you subsequently.
Real friends will help you move furniture, ride into the airport on you, and assist you with your own homework.
Avoid making too many requirements of your friends. If you are in a constant need of assistance, it may be hard for individuals to get close enough for you to consider you a friend.
Change plans on your friend.
If you are great friends with somebody, you’ll stay friends together, whatever your plans are. How can your friend react should you decide to change plans? If you were planning on heading out to the night, see if your buddy would rather stay home and watch a picture by yourself.
If a friend reduces your petition, that doesn’t automatically mean that you lost a friendship, but the way that they react can tell you a lot about them. Is it true that your friend react like your strategy is the lamest idea ever? That’s a bad signal. Is it true that your friend legitimately wish to go to a film and become a homebody?
Open up to your friend and chat about something personal.
School friends or acquaintances aren’t interested in assisting you to get through rough times. They are just interested in having friends that are convenient and easy fun on Friday nights. That is not to say that there’s not a place for these kinds of friends, but if you are wondering who your true, good buddies are, you need to open up and see how they react.
Tell your friend how you feel about annually, or about a situation with your family that’s stressing you out. Do not expect answers, but if you do not get a sympathetic ear, or if your buddy seems annoyed, that is not a fantastic sign.
This is different than gossip. Lots of people like to gossip. That doesn’t make them good friends.
Invite your friend to hang out with your family.
While it’s possible to have good friends which don’t necessarily mesh with your own parents and your grandparents, if your friend gets along well with your loved ones, that’s a fantastic sign. If your friend enjoys hanging out at your house, and your family loves having your friend about, it is a sign your friend feels comfortable about you, and you can take what they are saying at face value.
Invite a friend over for dinner with your family for an easy and quick means of analyzing the circumstance. Make certain that you ask your parents first, to make sure it’s okay.
Watch for signs of “using.”
Often, individuals will behave friendly whenever they want to get something out of you. It is usually best to prevent these kinds of relationships. Users will flatter you and try to make you feel good with their focus, but won’t ever be willing to hang out with you if the circumstances are not perfect.
If you have got a friend using you to your vehicle, your Xbox, or your swimming pool, ask them to hang out in the time, or say that your car’s in the store. If they cancel, that’s a terrible sign.
Watch for signs of jealousy.
Sometimes, friendships can suffer from jealousy, especially if the 2 members are at different points currently. If you and your buddy both made the team, for instance, but you made varsity and your friend didn’t, your friendship is able to begin to suffer. But good friends can learn to look past an initial jealousy and put the friendship at the front. Signs of jealousy comprise:
Your friend never celebrates your achievements, or criticizes rather than congratulates
Your friend becomes more remote
You feel a “negative” energy
Your friend disappears you when you’re struggling and need help
Watch for indications of two-facedness.
Anyone who bad-mouths you to others isn’t a buddy. If you are getting mixed messages from somebody else, or whether you’re picking up that someone is talking about you otherwise to your own face than to other people, that is not a buddy.
Talk to your other buddies, if you are curious how you’re spoken about in private. Great friends will let you know the truth.
If anyone bad-mouths you to your face, that is obviously not a friend. Joking around with somebody is one thing, but when someone puts you down and does not recognize that it is hurting your feelings, that’s not somebody with your friendship in mind.
Confront someone who you think is playing with you.
If you suspect that a friend might be jealous, or two-faced, or using you for something, but can’t really figure it out, sit them down and have a one-on-one conversation when you feel calm and ask them, point blank,”Are we friends?”
While it may seem like a weird question, and the individual will probably be taken aback, it is possible to follow up with what you have been noticing. “I’ve noticed that you only wish to hang out once you can utilize my swimming pool and that you’re talking crap about me to others when I am not around. That does not seem like a friend. What is happening?”
Let people explain themselves. If you don’t like what you hear, or if they attempt to defend behavior that’s indefensible, that person is not your buddy.
